Most days I don’t feel like I’m really very good at anything. I see other people’s stuff–photographs, art, writing– and think, “they are so much better than me! Who am I fooling?!”
Why did I start this blog? Because a friend on Facebook had one and I thought it looked awesome. Because I thought I had lots of interesting and maybe amusing ideas to share with people.
So far the first post I didn’t think too hard on, the one that made me laugh the most is the one that got MAYBE four views. But post anything with the tag “Dr. Who” and you freak out all of WordPress. I think I got the most followers here with that. I’m pretty sure they’re disappointed now. Sorry, I’m not a Whovian, though my husband and best friend are. You won’t be seeing much of that here. Feel free to go.
My post about writers, the one where I shared a picture from my BF page where I talked about writing, that got a few views, and a share. That’s something, right?
You see, I have this… Problem. Difficulty? Issue? Mental defect? Yes, that’s it. If I am up to late, or do something I am happy with that doesn’t get much love, or a combination on the two, I often feel… Inadequate. I get depressed and have a mini existential crisis. What am I doing? Why am I here? WTH?!
Tonight its: why the heck do I have a blog?
If it is to seek approval, I am failing miserably. Sure, I do get the random like, I gain a follower here and there, maybe even a comment or two. But, I place very little meaning in likes. Likes tell me nothing. A like is nothing more than an acknowledgement. I saw it, it’s there, it exists. I left my like here, so you know I’ve seen it, job done.
I want to know WHY you liked it. WHAT did you like about it. RESPOND TO ME INTERNETS! Don’t tag my post with your impersonal mass-produced ‘like rubber stamp and move on to the next blog. Talk to me. Use your words.
Advancements in technology have blessed us all with the gloriousness that is the internet! With it we are limitless! We can move pixilated mountains with a copy/paste function, we can leave our marks on walls across the world! Yet you choose to do nothing more than click a one dimensional button that says “LIKE”?! How dare you waste the hard work and effort of the slew of people who worked to bring you the amazing ability that is that tiny button?! You’ve wasted their time!
Give someone with a bit of artistic skill and the will to use it a few cans of spray paint in varying colors and they can turn a grey concrete wall into a canvas, and they leave a bold and imagined and creative image for eyes to behold. Love it or hate it, graffiti is an individualized mark of a single person. It is art. “This is me, I was here, remember it, remember me” it says. Would you give that piece of art a thumbs up and walk away? Do you even vocalize the word “like”?
Because I write, I am a writer. Because I aspire to do something with it, I am aspiring. There for I am an aspiring writer. I may not be the best there is, I for one believe there is no “best there is”. We are all good in our own right.
But even if I suck, tell me about it! Tell me about my run-ons, inform me of my misspellings. Show me my point is wrong. When I say I hate when fashion makes the front page, tell me I’m dumb! When I say Kate Beckinsale could take Taylor Swift in a Battle to the Dress, tell me why Taylor has the butt kicking skills to beat Kate in a fancy dress brawl! When I share with you my writing, I want you tell me what you think!
Why have a blog if you don’t want people to tell you something!
Tell me I’m awesome. Tell me I’m not. Say it with words!